Friday, May 22, 2009

5229 Entry


Saturday night Suki and I attended a play party for a group who's munches she has been attending. The party was held in a space where we helped to throw a large NYE party at the beginning of the year. This is no coincidence as she had suggested the space for the play party and introduced the proper contacts to the proper people. I remember her telling me last year in prep for the NYE party that it was a really cool space and would be an awesome place to do suspensions. That seems to be one of our things, really cool spaces with large beams and pillars that would have a dramatic atmosphere for suspensions. This particular room of the building is brick and block walls with about a 20' ceiling. Through the middle of the room there is a very large I-beam with a couple of concrete columns holding up the beam. Its this beam with its columns that really drew our attention. The rest of the room is closer to what I feel a 'dungeon' would be with its block walls. Fortunately, this is the warmest room in the space. This was also the socialization area for the party and not the 'dungeon' proper.

After socializing and sitting through the stapling demo, we decided that it was time to play. The 'dungeon' area was cold and a little clammy, and not totally to my preference. There were a few pieces of furniture in there, pretty standard fare for a play party. The person that was supposed to bring a suspension rig didn't show up so I was a bit disappointed as I had thought that we may do a partial that night. The style of bondage that I like to do doesn't really suit most furniture, and thinking about the party earlier in the day I had come to the conclusion that we may have to do a standing scene or switch over to high protocol. I figured I would play it by ear. We stayed in the 'dungeon' for a few minutes as I contemplated where I wanted to do a scene. It was loud from all the other players and could have been somewhat distracting. When I'm in head space, it can be hard for me to tell if other people around are going to be distraction to me or not. At times the room melts away, and at others every noise can become a distraction. It's all internal and based on what/how I'm feeling in the moment. Most of the time people are easy to block out, but I can have a bitch of a time with music when I'm in head space.

We went back into the socializing are and decided to do a scene based around one of the columns in the middle of the room. There was a lot of chatter and people milling about, but it felt pretty comfortable. At least, it felt more comfortable than the 'dungeon' did at the time. As I was tying the Ushiro Tasuki on Suki, J asked if we could move the scene over a little bit. This was very much at the beginning of it and I was no where near head space. I was a tad self conscience as there were a few people from a group I'm heavily involved in there that had not seen us play before. This makes getting into head space take a little longer. At first I was somewhat put off by having to move the scene, until I realized that J had a ladder and was hooking a shibari ring to that massive I-beam. "Maybe a partial will happen yet", I thought to myself.

Having completed the harness and a Matanawa on Suki, J had the ring installed and the ladder moved out of the way. I remember overhearing someone say that it looked like Suki was ready for the ring. Was this some sort of weird manifestation of a fantasy that we had upon initially seeing this space?

The ring was a little high for my liking as I had go up on my toes to feed the ropes up and through it. I knew I had to keep myself alert and careful due to its height, and alas another deterrent to me slipping into head space. Well, I keep myself out of it with suspensions anyway because I need to be alert and very conscience of every little thing that is happening when I do them. A modicum of slipping in is alright with partials, but even that wasn't going to happen during this scene. I was focused enough on what I was doing during the suspension that the goings on about me fell out of conscienceness. At least if they weren't going to go away due to head space, the concentration would do it. At this point any self conscienceness also fell away. It became me, Suki, and the ropes in an elaborate dance of balance on both our parts.

I lovingly lifted the one leg that grounded her to the building, holding it against both her body and mine. Gently swaying her in a small circle like a light swing on a breezy spring afternoon, I imagined floating in space and time. The swirling movements becoming a calm meditation of emptiness. These few brief moments were the closest I got to head space. As I put her right leg back down on the ground and checked in with her, she whispered: "Master, my right hand is starting to go numb", I asked if it tingled yet. Glancing at the harness I guessed that the first layers of the Tasuki were responsible for this as they had a number of wraps across her wrist. "Time to take her down", I thought, "It'll be a few minutes to get to those wraps". Getting her off the suspension ring was enough to clear up the problem. I love the Tasuki harness, but it has always given us a problem here and there in suspensions. Worked great for MP, but every body is a different piece of clay.

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